Remember Remember Remember

The Oxford Dictionary describes fire as the act of being removed from your current employment. I was never really a fan of Guy Fawkes until I saw V for Vendetta. I was never really a fan of Guy Fawkes until I came to Britain. I could never really understand why people wanted to a celebrate the attempted burning down of British parliament. Then I started to learn about the likes of John Major, Margeret Thatcher and Gordon Brown and I thought, fireworks and bonfires for everyone. Now I'm not claming to be an expert on the politcs of Britain, but these people are some of the most boring people I have ever seen, and a little fire up the backside every now and again couldn't do them much harm.

But now to the point. I bought a £50 firework which was just shorter than my good self. It was your basic firework, green and blue in colour and type that makes people produce those sounds of approval that are so difficult to type. A group of us were down in Port Meadow, the largest piece of land in England untouched by artificial fertelisers. We were firing these fire works by planting them in the ground, lighting them, and running for cover. Only sometimes they were aimed at cows. But then one clever barmen decided it would be fun to light it and throw it up in the air. He immediately regretted the decision. Now when you throw a stick it tends spin in the air, as does a firework. When this firework decided to blow its top it was aimed directly back at us. Now remeber the first scene mof Lord of the Rings when everyones celebrating Bilbos birthday and the big dragon firework swoops down on the party. It wasn't like that at all. Everyone got out of the way pretty easily and unharmed, which made it all the more easier to chase the barman across the across the meadow and hurl mud at him until he was covered from head to toe.